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STILL MEETING CHALLENGES, DAY BY DAY
Despite her severe arthritis and limited mobility, Norma
Friedman's world is rich with family and full of life. You can
tell from the sprightly way she greets you when you visit. Not
one to sit in a chair, and say "come in" when you knock, Norma
peeks out of the doorway with a cheery "this way" almost before
the elevator door closes. Her demeanor reflects her personality
- open, friendly, 'can do' - honed during a lifetime that's seen
its share of challenges. "My husband left after 35 years of
marriage," Norma explains, "and we had three children."
Raising those three children alone was the biggest challenge she
ever faced, Norma admits. But, like she says, "you do what you
have to do."
That's an attitude that Norma Friedman and Jewish Family
Services have in common. Maybe that's why they seemed well
suited to one another. Through the years, Jewish Family Services
staff members have seen Norma through some difficult times,
beginning with the period after her divorce. Already familiar
with the Jewish Community Center where she used to participate
in water aerobics classes, Norma doesn't remember exactly when
she first engaged the services of JFS. But she does remember the
companionship of her 'counselors' - first, Hillary (Norma
doesn't remember Hillary's last name) - "She kept me sane,"
Norma said - then Marilyn Cole, and, most recently, Lyudmila
Shaulov.
"They are always coming by to visit," she says with a smile. "I
don't drive anymore, so I don't get out as much as I used to.
It's nice to have someone to talk to."
Originally from Maryland, Norma has spent a lifetime being
responsible for herself and others. She worked for the Air Force
before coming to Columbus and being hired as a secretary at
Nationwide, from which she retired. "I always took care of
everything and everybody," Norma says proudly. "I worked, I took
care of the family - there was always a full meal on the table."
Living alone now, she doesn’t have the responsibility she had
before, although she values her independence just as much as
ever. Norma's children visit when they can, but with jobs and
children of their own, she doesn't see them as much as she did
in their earlier years. They're glad to know that someone else
is stopping by regularly, too. Her son Steve recalls that the
JFS representatives were very good at hooking his mother up with
the resources she needed to stay independent.
Due to medical and financial difficulties, Norma eventually had
to leave the house where she had raised her family. After
sharing a home with her daughter for a while, she now lives in a
cozy apartment at Seton Square East ... and apartment that
speaks of a life well lived and a family that's still very much
the focus of her life.
A full-length portrait of herself in her wedding gown hangs on
the far wall of Norma's living room. It's the first thing you
notice when you enter. But it's just one of many family
photographs that surround Norma. A portrait of each son on his
Bar Mitzvah hangs above the sofa, alongside portraits of Norma's
parents and her in-laws. On the opposite wall, above her
computer, are photographs of her daughter and her sons in recent
times with their wives and children. There are photographs on
the table beside the sofa, too, of happy grandchildren and a
happy grandmother.
Norma is a happy grandmother, and a happy person, despite the
hardships and handicaps in her life. She stays connected to the
world through her children, and via the Internet, which she
calls "a wonderful thing." Although she has her own kitchen,
meals are often available at the apartment complex, there are
numerous planned activities, and Norma can always go down to the
common room and visit with the other residents if she's feeling
lonely. Of course, her JFS counselor still stops by, too, just
to keep in touch.
Aynn Kilburger Titchenal is a freelance writer from
Grandview Heights, Ohio, where she lives with Doug, her husband
of 25 years, an award-winning photographer, and their Shih Tzu,
Tommy.
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